My Family

I guess in the modern days, I come from a big family. Not quite as big as my brother in law who is the oldest of 8 or his mother who is one of something like 14 kids, but we are big enough.

We lost my grandfather a week ago. After a very sudden and tragic heart attack and car accident, he went to be with my Nana. Of course the entire family gathered here for the funeral.

My husband and I were married almost 11 years ago. ( and yes sometimes it feels longer). We were married on New Year's Eve and Grandfather celebrated his 75th birthday a few days later. It was great that as long as we were all together, that we celebrated his milestone. That was the last time all my aunts, uncles and cousins were in the same room together. Well, all of us that there were at the time.

We have grown a bit since then. Marriages and kids have swelled our numbers.

So, since we were altogether, this past week it was kind of exciting, even if the circumstances were sad.

Yes, I am the oldest grandchild. Have been all my life. Even my husband is younger than me. I keep thinking that having us all in the same room would have made Gradfather swell with pride and love. All of his grandkids, spouses and great grandchildren together. He is smiling now. I know that he is.

So, for the fact that there are 31 of us, including the parents, we are a motly crew. We love each other.

So, I will end this with a message to each of them...

Aunt Chris and Uncle Mark... Wonderful to see you again. Don't melt in AZ!!!

Aunt Gail and Uncle Rick... Too long since we last saw each other! Miss you!

Uncle Steve... remember that you are considered the "cool" uncle!

Aunt Debi... Thank you for everything. You were a rock for the siblings at the hospital!

Wendy, Tom and Ali... Thank you for being there. It was great having you be part of everything!

Josh... Miss you! Hope you didn't torture Jeane too much in the car.

Brandon and Gabe... Damn it! Stop growning! You are not allowed to be taller than me!

Court, Jim, Caden and Zane... I'm glad we got to spend so much time together! The boys are just too damn cute!

Karen, Steve, Nathaniel and Gabe... It was wonderful having you with us for all that time! Don't be strangers! Come again!

Jeremy and Jeane... You guys need to come east again! We will take you anywhere you want to go!

Kat... Thanks for the chocolate! I am so jelious of you being in England. Stay out for a while so that I can save my pennies and come see you!

Cody... Happy Birthday! I can't believe that you are over 21!

Brett.. my youngest cousin... rememeber to enjoy your last year in high school. After this you will be expected to think about the rest of your life and begin to plan it out. Choose wisely and I know you will.

Mom and Dad... thanks for all the help this week. I hope that you know everything we did was for you and what we thought Grandfather would have wanted.

I have one last thought.

Besides, my aunts, uncles and parents... I am the one who got to spend the most time with grandfather.... the privelge of being the oldest... There were times I really hated him. Things he said, things he did. I know why he did or said them. However, even though we had a falling out and I had told him that sometimes he needed that filter on his mouth, I still loved the man. I may have seemed to have a "good handle" on my emotions this week. I really don't. I know what it's like to loose a parent... especially under tragic circumstances. I just knew what needed to be done and was able to push it aside a bit and get it done.

I cried almost all the way home from the train station the other night. I cried when I read Jeane and Court's blogs. I can't even go near my father's blog. I get misty when my residents, many of whom knew Grandfather come to me and express their condolences. I get weepy when I meet friends and neighbors... almost all who have a story to tell about the judge. I well up everytime I turn on my computer. My desktop background is now the pictures of the cousins.

I love you all. Thank you for all being here. Let's not let it be 11 years again!!! Promise!