Loosing a sister is sad

I was blogging before about EMily and I had to stop. It was having a hard time. I started blogging after my cousin introduced it to me and how she just writes these little stories about her days raising her son. It's a nice way to keep in touch with everyone.
But's it's also the only outlet I have. I really have no friends. No one I can call and have over for a cup of tea and a shoulder. I have people I work with, people I talk too. But we never get invited to go out to parties, the movies or dinner. The few friends I had left over from high school basically disappeared into their own lives and have either moved away or for some reason, namely husbands, don't want anything to do with me any more.
My sister in laws are kinda better. But they are sisters and have this bond that I can't even begin to share with them or imitate.
My own sister is too much of a bitch to want to do anything with her biological family.
I'm jelious that my own mother goes away one weekend a year with her sisters. I just feel so alone. I have no one. It kills me.
Even if my sister wasn't a bitch, when we were getting a long, things were better.
Sorry. I'm just lonely and feeling sad for myself. I'll go cry over my sewing machine for a while. I'm making these bags for my nephews to take to the beach. I don't know why I'm bothering. It's a cheap way of trying to by some sisterly love from my sister in law. Stupid, right?
But yet, I bet you have friends you can go get a drink with when you day has been shitty. Not too many bars will let my daughter sit next to me and have a Cosmo.

School's Out For... 10 days?!

Yesterday was the last day of school for Emily. She's now offically a second grader! (Wow! Where did the time go?) School will start again Monday after the Fourth of July weekend. She will be in summer school this again. It's great. Helps out with day care and the rest. Emily has never spent the summer out side of school. She thinks this is normal. I love it.
And Emily loves school. I'm just sad to be done with the teacher we had this year. We loved her. I'm really going to miss her.
So yesterday being the last half day of school, today having no school and tomorrow having no school we needed to do something for day care. One of the girls I work with has a 16 year old daughter. So, Carrisa has been here for two days and will be back tomorrow. So far so good.
Next week Em will start with the new day care provider. It'll be nice to have a routine again.

Boy my limbs hurt!

For anyone who has seen the Bill Stiller flick, Night at the Musaem, you will get this. Those who haven't will have to bear with me. There is a scene where Larry is talking to Atilla the Hun and there is questions about pulling him apart by all four limbs. Great way to strech the back, but this is why I hate the holidays.
Today is Father's DAy. Happy Father's DAy to all the Dad's I know. My boss asked me to work a bit today. Okay. No big deal. Brian isn't all that upset. But then, we are supposed to go to my mother's to have a meal with Grandfather. And they all decided on lunch. Then, my sister in law called and said that she wass doind Father's Day at the same time as my mother. Never mind the fact that I'm at work until 2!
I feel likw I'm being pulled in 4 different directions. Usually, our holidays go a bit smoother than this. I hate the last minute stuff, so I start prompting all the sides of the family around Mother's DAy for Father's Day plans. But this year, because my neice... well, today is her birthday and my "sister" is having her birthday party today, through a monkey wrench into the plans.
Not that any of us were invited.
But, I figured, screw it.
Brian was at his parents early this morning, and will be at my parents for lunch. Then I will join them later, maybe for a swim of if I can convince my mother to take Em for a couple of hours we will go to the movies. We still haven't seen Indy!
All I know is that I currently have 2.5 hours of work left!

Babysitter Trials

Our babysitter quit on us. She decided, and I completely understand this, that Emily was just too sick for her to handle. It was too much with the number of little ones she had and the possiblity that Emily could get so sick in her care.
So, for a while Brian and I have rearranged our work schedules so that we have been home with her. But with summer school coming up and other things, we need to find a babysitter to take Emily before and after school.
But it's more of a process than I had ever thought it would be. I want someone who is caring, clean, fun for the kids, CHEAP, etc. All the things that you would want in a babysitter. Basically, Mary Poppins incarnite. But that not happening. The worst is finding someone who will take Emily with all her possible problems and issues.
So, I think I found some one. But the biggest problem is that she haas pets. So, what you say. But have you ever been around Emily and a dog? She HATES them. They look at her. They sniff her. It's worse than hell on earth. For her and those who have to listen to the screaming.
The up side is that she only needs to be there for an hour in the morning and about an hour in the afternoon. I'm not sure about how she is going be about the dogs and cats.
This is one of the reason's we don't have any pets, plus that fact that I'm not really an animal person. I'm kind of a stuffed animal person. The kind that are pink and fluffy.
So, tomorrow Brian and I are going to interview that woman who owns the care center. But I have to tell you that it's been hard to try and explain to Emily why she doesn't go to the last sitter's any more, with out telling her that she's the reason and give her a complex at 7.
This is when I wish I worked from home. But it's hard to give nursing care from my couch.
Anybody got a million dollars they want to give me?